It Never Ends

Or so it seems….

Alongside my documented addiction problem I have been dealing/managing with type 1 diabetes, and lately it has started to get on top of me.

So hopefully you’ll forgive me another vent!

Dealing with diabetes is a big job in of itself as you will need to keep tabs on your blood glucose levels, is the level too high or too low? How will i correct it, should I be giving myself a correctional insulin dose or leave it to see if it comes down? What if I give myself too much insulin and suffer a hypoglycemic attack? You start to get a snippet of what it takes to manage this horrible disease (that was only a snippet of the thought processes I could have written but that would have been another post entirely).

It grinds away at you mercilessly its one of the reasons why I don’t beat myself up for developing an addiction to alcohol, it provided a temporary relief from the everyday consideration of your disease by way of making you forget anything was wrong, which is incredibly dangerous considering the ramifications of pursuing that particular method of “comfort”

It is all too easy to forget and/or play down how hard it is to manage diabetes, as my doctor told me once, for all our advances in treatment we are still using relatively blunt instruments to treat it.

It’s why I will always have serious admiration for people who have suffered with type 1 or 2 for 30+ years, that is a hell of an achievement one I think that only fellow diabetics can truly appreciate as they are living through it themselves. They have seemingly found a way to cope with the condition which one day I will find and hopefully pass it on as we’re all in this together.

So if you see someone you know who has diabetes and looks to be struggling or whose mood may be a little “off” take a thought to remember how difficult it is/can be to manage the disease while trying to live your life, just be there for them it doesn’t have to be much but from a personal viewpoint just knowing someone is there helps the feelings of loneliness that can creep in.

Thank you for reading this little vent ūüôā

I definitely feel better!

 

Dave

Untitled

Posted in addiction, Alcohol, Anxiety, depression, Diabetes, Health, Personal Thoughts | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

My Permanent Sobriety Part 2

As a continuation from my last post I thought it might be of some interest if I wrote about how I first developed my addiction and propped it up over the years before now.

I believe it all started when I was initially diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, for the first 6 months I handled it pretty well, as the doctor told me almost too well so it really was an inevitability that I started to really comprehend what the implications were of having a life long disease. Initially you can’t comprehend the idea of injecting yourself every day and monitoring your blood sugar levels every day to make sure you stay reasonably healthy. Its hard but you do eventually get used to it and it slowly becomes apart of yourself and becomes no stranger than getting dressed in the morning.

The problem starts is when emotionally it starts wearing on you, especially when your levels start getting unstable and you have to expend a good deal of energy and patience to fix it. You then start looking for ways to mitigate that frustration that despair you get when you can seemingly never catch a break or that life is kicking you when your down. That was the time I turned to drink in greater and greater amounts as an escape from the harsh realities of life, to actually feel good and at least for a few hours forget about that damned disease that you have.

That is a powerful force to be dangled over you, who here would never want a way of never feeling bad or at least a way of stopping yourself from feeling guilt or pain or whatever negative emotion you can think of?

For me alcohol was the answer and soon I just couldn’t exist without it.

To make matters worse I have a problem with anxiety and depression (no doubt exacerbated by the booze) so any time i would have a panic attack or feel hemmed in and useless, alcohol was always there to pick me up and make me feel better. Since the effects only last a few hours you then go about trying to keep that buzz going constantly, hangovers are bad enough without the added anxiety and desperation so you try to top up your “medication” so to speak to keep yourself ignorant of the outside world and various relationships it completely cuts you off from everything to the point where the only things that matter is you and your next drink.

Perhaps it was another method of self-harm, even if it didn’t involve cutting myself I was for sure drinking myself to oblivion each time I got my hands on alcohol, I’d get so drunk I would pass out still holding the can.

To be able to look back at my past like this is very scary, to think where i would have ended up if I hadn’t snapped out of my malaise long enough to realise i needed help, or without my family namely my mum and dad who helped me on that first baby step towards recovery. It does make me feel relieved not to mention proud of myself that I was able to reverse the course I had set for myself, It’s quite possibly one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do or still do in fact since it never quite leaves you until you learn to control it and manage it.

I have a chance now to be who I want to be, To strengthen friendships and to finally make a better life for myself and for that I’ll always be eternally grateful to everyone who has helped me through this.

 

Thank you for reading

 

Dave

Posted in addiction, Alcohol, Anxiety, depression, Health, Personal Thoughts | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

My Permanent Sobriety 5 Months And Counting

I had always thought what it might be like to under go treatment for addiction, or in my case alcohol addiction because I had a strong fondness for beer. I would always drink my alcohol of choice way too quick ergo I would want more and then I would be well away getting completely off my face. The curiosity came about when I would try to kid myself that if I ever had a problem that I would be able to handle it by myself or be able to catch it in time and stop it becoming a real problem, then I would often think about people who needed the help who had to turn to their local substance misuse services and arrogantly thinking to myself that I would never let myself get like that or ever develop an addiction.

The punchline is that I did develop an addiction to alcohol, a fairly serious one with the added complication of being a type 1 diabetic on top of that. As you can imagine the implications of what an alcohol condition combined with diabetes is unpleasant, but its something you never contemplate when you’re in the throes of addiction. As if you thought about it you would be forced to think about the side effects, but then when you do that you think you may have to quit which is something you absolutely don’t want to do when all you think about is where you can get your next drink.

I was fairly lucky in retrospect that I managed to get help and stop drinking fairly early 27/28 years of age, before any damage that had been done to¬†myself would become permanent or seriously damaging. It still scares me to think back from 5 years ago when it all started up, to now and thinking about all that alcohol I consumed, and possibly what state would I¬†have been in 15-20 years down the line, it’s absolutely terrifying.

Everything came to a head where even I could see that I wasn’t even drinking for the taste anymore, I was drinking because I felt I had to, I felt that it treated my anxiety, when I was drinking I didn’t feel lonely anymore and so on and so forth. That was the time that I realised I needed help and was ready and accepting of help because if you don’t really want to quit then no one can really help until you ‘accept’ it yourself. I went through that as well, I had attended an appointment at the local substance misuse service centre and said my ultimate goal was to ‘cut down’ on my drinking to a sensible level, which was a challenge I accepted, full of energy that I was going to make a change in my life.

The problem here is that I never attended another appointment and spiralled even deeper into myself, isolating myself even more because when you have alcohol what else do you need? It seems silly now having taken myself out of that, but at the time when your that desperate for relief, the want to forget about the world around you?

It seems like the most important thing in the world.

Which makes me proud that I got help and that I managed to quit and have that personal life goal of maintaining my abstinence from beer permanently, there’s no cutting down or drinking on certain days because that just won’t work with me, recognising that and even ¬†sometimes when you think id like to have a beer¬†I don’t, as you have made a commitment to yourself. The next step in my journey is to get to know myself again, to reacquaint with the person I once knew, which is scary as it’s the unknown but at the same time its turning that unknown into something positive because you can finally be who you want to be.

Being able to talk about it and own it is something that I’ve worked very hard on and it is the reason that I decided to write about my problems today, to have that mental release and to maybe give you the lovely readers a glimpse into the mind of a recovering alcoholic.

*Forgot to mention that The workers at my substance misuse service have been absolutely brilliant and that I would have been lost without them

 

Thank you for reading

 

Dave

Posted in addiction, Alcohol, Anxiety, depression, Health, Personal Thoughts, Recovery | Tagged , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Wolfenstein: The New Order, A Look Back At Greatness

Wolfenstein the new order is a perfect throwback to the time of crazy gun fights, explosions and nazi robot dogs by the infinite bucket load. This time however a coherent story is thrown into the mix along with likeable characters and a protagonist so fridge like that he can take absolutely anything thrown at him, bullets? Childs play, Rockets? A trifle, Nazi Robot dogs, Walking battle robots and secret Moon Bases? All fall by the way side from the onslaught of B.J Blaskowicz.

Thats the fine line this game treads, with all the crazy it throws at you, its told in such a way that you believe it, every single word of it. Thats the beauty of it, amid the chaos of double shotgun and laser weapon battles that the game hip thrusts into your face the story pushes you further along than the combat could by itself. The voice acting is top-notch bringing the story to life and bringing characters that we as players can connect with, a far cry from the stereotypical walking fridge tank that makes up most first person shooter protagonists these days.

The fact that this is one of the few games that has no multiplayer component works in Wolfenstein’s favour. There is no divergence of attention between a half-hearted story and a lazy attempt at a fun multiplayer mode, there is a singular focus to deliver a riveting first person experience and the publisher and developer should be commended with going what was in this day an age classed as a risky move.

However for those gamers with severely clogged up hard drives you should be warned that this will take a serious chunk out of what memory you may have left, a whopping 50 gigs.

The downside with Wolfenstein, the same that afflicts many games of its type is its replayablility, which is somewhat limited. Unless backtracking for the obligatory collectibles that the game boasts then there is not a lot for the player to go back to after completion.

Aside from that, you absolutely can’t go wrong by picking this up.

 

 

Posted in Appreciation, Entertainment, Gaming, Personal Thoughts, Reviews/Retrospective | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Last Of Us Remastered PS4 An Appreciation

tlou2

Wow Its certainly been a while since I’ve last blogged. I cannot help feeling that its like a dilapidated old house that is in need of a refurbish to bring it back up to par, so I have decided to write about “The Last Of¬†Us” a¬†game by Naughty Dog of Uncharted fame (and many other things which you should definitely go look up).

Its been one of the few games lately that has sparked a real excitement in me, it didn’t feel a run of the mill job where profits were put in front of creative effort and fun. Its not often that I have completed a game 4 times in a relatively short-ish amount of time and not feel bored, because there were often things that I missed and wanted to go back and explore, or even just to drink in the wonderful visuals that the upgraded version on the PS4 showers your eyeballs with.

But before I get too ahead of myself I should talk about what the game is, its a 3rd person action/stealth/horror game, but lets ignore that for now.

The story concerns a bacterial infection which has spread across the globe at an alarming rate, ushering in the possible doom of the human race. The infection in question makes anyone highly aggressive much like its zombie brethren in other fiction, yes its one of those settings where the world is on its downwards teeter on the cliff of no return into the sea of extinction, but to be honest the main draw of the story is about the interactions with the characters and the characters themselves. What they have been through and how it has shaped them as people, sure the world is falling apart but I want to see where our characters relationship (Joel) with his charge (Ellie) develops throughout the course of their exploits in the game.

tlou4

Its not often you see a game with as many strong female leaders as this does, but what makes it extra special is that none of them are Clichés, they are not (putting It crudely here) tits for show or the damsels in distress. They are real people getting by in an increasingly savage world which is refreshing in an industry that is pre-disposed (perhaps a little less so these days) to glorifying and objectifying women than taking them seriously. And they are brilliantly brought to life by the likes of Ashley Johnson (Ellie), Annie Wersching (Tess) and Merle Dandridge (Marlene).

That’s not to say that there aren’t great male performances either, Our main character Joel played by Troy Baker does a brilliant job as a gruff man who lost his daughter at the start of the outbreak, very little issue with what needs to be done to survive whether that be killing, stealing or whatever which can leave for a peculiar moral grey zone as you end up asking yourself would I have done that? Or you might also consider the context of societies break down where perhaps you would have no choice but to revert to being nasty and opportunistic to stay alive? Which is really gripping and utterly absorbing as you get taken along the path that the story takes you so you can find out the answers to those questions, if there are any at all.

Now for me personally I want to give a special mention to Nolan North, I freely admit that this could be me completely fanboying out (During a game of Saints Row 4 you had the opportunity to give your character Nolan North’s voice, you can bet your ass I chose it!) but I thought he was especially brilliant doing his dark turn playing the sinister “David” This might seem a little bit strange but its because he’s mainly known for his work as a good guy or at least a positive character, his performance was on point and deeply disturbing, from the beginning where you were not sure of his intentions to his outright creepiness when he imprisons Ellie you certainly wont forget him in¬†a hurry.

tlou3

The Last Of Us is a great game and im super happy to have finally got on board with the millions of other people who have played and loved this game, if you have never had the chance to play this before I thoroughly recommend that you check it out (The remastered edition in particular on PS4)

Its good to be back ūüôā

 

Thanks for Reading

Dave

Untitled

 

 

Posted in Appreciation, Entertainment, Gaming, Playstation, ps4, Reviews/Retrospective | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A Journey Through Destiny A.K.A Call Of Haloborderdutylands

destiny

So here we have Destiny, the latest shooter to be created by Bungie and published by evil overlords Activision. With a massive budget behind it and plans to support it for years to come, these guys have bet everything but the kitchen sink on the presumed success of Destiny, and has it paid off?

Ehhh Kind of….

The game clearly has elements of call of duty, borderlands and of course Halo hence the posts title, while this is not a bad thing in itself but you can’t help seeing glaring parts of each game mashed together, such as the special abilities/powers from borderlands and Similarities of the enemies of Destiny to Halo, for example the Fallen Vandals are Elites and the Dregs could conceivably be Grunts. Now I think we can all agree…. Or mostly agree that Halo was a fun game and that using the lessons learnt from its development is not a bad thing right?

vandal elite

(Destiny-Vandal  Elite-Halo)

I have to object to the possibility that this feels like a re-skinned Halo mash-up, granted an extremely beautiful mash-up but it feels lazy and uninspired. This is made worse by the barely fucking their “story” of which you initially get the impression you’ve been dumped in a universe surrounded by darkness and danger, then it quickly descends into you must find this magical thing, then go to this place and find the other magical thing etc etc.

dreggrunt

(Destiny-Dreg  Grunt-Halo)

Then, before you know it you’ve found “The Heart Of Darkness” which controls a nasty race of machines (from the Terminator perhaps..) go blow that up then oop end of game……

The whole process of the misleading start of the story campaign to the ending credits takes 4-6 fucking hours! For something billed as an MMORPG as well as a shooter this is absolutely inexcusable and at full damn price too, upwards of 80 odd pounds for the stupid limited edition its daylight robbery. You’re essentially paying for what the game might turn out to be rather than the game in its current state, case in point we initially get hyped because apparently we can do battle across the solar system in an epic quest to… yadeyada, turns out there are only 2 fucking planets (Mars and Venus)¬†and¬†the moon to do stuff on, I don’t count earth as that is where you start and who¬†wants to explore earth when you’re promised an adventure across space, shooting aliens and other creatures in the face?

mydestinystatstecniclion

(Not bad for a game I’ve been bitching about!)

The endgame content is a complete shambles in my opinion also, essentially its do missions with increasing difficulty and co-op plus multiplayer in the form of deathmatches and other modes which you could compete in during the story anyway, rinse and repeat a hundred hyper-billion times and you have what the game considers a good way of holding your attention until the over priced DLC comes out.

So after all my bitching and complaining do I still have the game and am I still playing? Yes….. In fact nearly max level and still playing it somewhat, this is where I think Activision have stepped in with their experience of the call of duty franchise, they’ve perfected the art of creating “digital crack” You don’t feel any great sense of pleasure or fun from playing the game, but you feel compelled to keep playing in the hope of getting better armour and weapons, that carrot constantly gets dangled in front of you, oh do you want the shiny exotic equipment?! Well then you’d better keep playing for the chance to find some!

After all that what did I like about the game? The action is competently done, the graphics are stunning and co-op play is always fun but these features are so “safe” that there actually extremely boring to talk about, hence the tiny time given to them by yours truly.

Oh and one more thing, the voice acting sucks, if you’re going to get big name actors in to do voice overs, make sure they can VOICE-ACT because peter dinklage is awful and bill nighy sounds half asleep and disinterested in his role that it begs the question why should I care about the story if he isn’t even trying?

Finally,

the game will make you feel dirty for playing it, but you’ll keep coming back for more….

just, try and get it on the cheap.

 

Thanks for reading

 

Dave

Untitled

 

Posted in Entertainment, Gaming, Personal Thoughts, Reviews/Retrospective | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Movie Time: The Purge

purgeI had high hopes for this movie, ever since I saw the trailer years ago… Or what feels like years ago.

It was such a brilliant concept for a thriller, in the not too distant future where every year you have a 12 hour period where all crime is legal, even murder. How it could explore the human condition and given the option between “freeing the beast” as he movie puts it or keeping to yourself and not committing any crime at all.

Of course another question would be how did society ever get to the point that the “Purge” became a viable and accepted idea to cure their ills. Also what are the new founding fathers that get mentioned a few times at the start and the end of the film? Soulless dictators who seized power of the USA? The amount of questions you could ask about the film and its story is rather large which to me speaks of the subject matters potential, but do any of them get answered in any satisfactory form? Not even in the slightest…

The film follows a family of the typical class of rich Americans who seemingly have the perfect life and everything they could ever want, that’s another avenue to their credit they do explore a little bit during the film. The purge essentially kills off the poor and homeless¬†who can’t afford to protect themselves while the rich stay inside their houses with full on panic¬†mode safety lock down systems to keep them safe while all hell breaks loose outside. So essentially the purge isn’t designed to let humans¬†vent their primal aggression so¬†as to limit crime to one day of the year, its to eliminate the low earners homeless viewing them as low as parasites.

And there is our main conflict of the¬†film, our family the “Sandins” are locked down tight with there very expensive security systems when there dipshit son opens it all up to let this one bloodied up man inside,¬†he is on his own¬†yelling about being chased when we can quite clearly see that no one is around.

Now you might think im being harsh calling the son a dipshit but hold off on your judgement until the end.

This bloodied up stranger turn out to be a homeless man on the run from a gang of what seem to be crazy rich kids hell-bent on “cleansing the earth of the homeless filth”¬†at a glance you would think that they believe in their own hype and it is their duty to purge the less fortunate and¬†less affluent among society.¬†So here comes the choice that gets presented to our intrepid family, give up the man and save your family, or don’t comply and the gang of psychotic preps kill everyone inside the house, so perhaps now you can see that the kid who let the guy in the first place is a dipshit, but for the right reason.

This whole conflict is the premise of the movie, talk about your giant let-downs.

It’s competently done but it’s so insubstantial you’ll stop caring by the time you get to the end of the movie. The moral dilemma only bubbles to the surface once the family have shot and tied up the homeless man in a bid to save themselves, what makes them think is pressing on the gun shot wound the man sustained in his attempted escape which forces them to look at what they are doing. It is at this point they decide not to give him up and fight, in the resulting chaos and gun fights the dad of the household gets stabbed and killed.

Tally one in the dipshit column for his dipshit son.

If it feels like I skimming the movie entirely and leaving important bits out don’t worry, you feel like that during the entire film, one way id choose to put it is that its like watching a proof of concept rather than a fully fleshed out movie.

It’s such an interesting idea and the back story could have made for a much more interesting film, so yes it is a let down. However id recommend watching it on the cheap or on a streaming service if you can find it as the ideas and potential that oozes from it is worth talking about.

Thanks for reading ūüôā

 

Dave

Untitled

 

Posted in Entertainment, films, movies, Movies/Films, Personal Thoughts, Reviews/Retrospective | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Games With Gold: Crimson Dragon

248590-CD

Games with gold is a promotion for the Xbox 360 and X1 where you get 1-2 free games a month if you have a gold subscription to its Xbox live service.

Crimson Dragon is one of this months free game on the Xbox one, without the promotion I wouldn’t have even given the game a 2nd thought, and because its free there was no excuse not to give it a whirl.

So after loading it up you cant help but get a nostalgic feeling for the games of old because it feels very much like a game of yesteryear (which could be a compliment or insult depending on your outlook). Unfortunately that does apply to the visuals, it’s not a pretty game, for a next-gen platform like the Xbox One that is a definitive cross against its name… Or it would be if it wasn’t free. I will try to not keep going back to “its free” as the game should be judged on its merits rather than price tag.

Its nostalgic design is a plus for me as it took me back to a time of the Sega Saturn or the Dreamcast, bringing good memories to the fore. Terrible story, weird dialogue and limiting gameplay it’s all there, celebrating the awful in a so bad its good kind of way.

It’s an on rails shooter (you only concentrate on shooting bad guys while the game takes care of the majority of the movement) which you don’t see many of now-a-days. All you do is fly around on a pre-determined path shooting monsters with a loose “story” to tie things up, plus some bonus objectives for each mission that’ll require a million and one replays to make sure you haven’t missed anything (or only a few retries if you have the reflexes of a caffeine addled ninja).

There are some nice little touches where you can buy dragons and other stuff in-between missions at HQ which acts as a Hub. Yes it is kind of cool that you can buy dragons, train them up and then evolve them like a less fluffy version of Pokemon but as far as i can tell the selection of dragons is very limited and you can happily complete the game with the dragon you started with as there’s no incentive or reason to try the others, unless you count achievements.

However if you don’t count yourself as a part of the achievement whore brother/sisterhood then you’ll find precious little here to keep your attention. If you just count the laughable story then it’s roughly 2-3 hours long and then after that if you really want you can try the multiplayer which I haven’t tried and am in no rush to do so. One final thing I have to mention is the fairly prominent micro-transactions which come in the form of jewels which in turn you can use to buy item packs to boost your dragon and to give you extra items.

To be blunt if you need boosts to finish this game even on its most difficult setting then its safe to say you are blind and have lost the function of both your hands, avoid!

In closing, the fact that they charged ¬£16 for this before games with gold is a rip off, this might be worth ¬£6-8 at most, being free now though it is worth a look even if it’s just out of morbid curiosity, pay nothing for a few hours being lightly entertained?

You can’t complain about that

Thank you for reading

Dave

Untitled

 

Posted in Appreciation, Entertainment, Gaming, Personal Thoughts, Reviews/Retrospective | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Diabetes And Me: Seldom Asked Questions

Its been nearly¬†5 years since I’ve been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and its amazing to think that all the things you have to do to manage the disease properly¬†have become no stranger than brushing your teeth in the morning.

Injecting Insulin? No problem, drawing blood to test glucose levels in my blood? Piece of cake. Its feels strange to think that there was a time when I didn’t need to do any of that, the only thing you had to do was decided what you wanted to eat and then eat it! The crazy thing is I can barely remember what that felt like, the condition has completely taken over and requires so much management that its hard to think that things used to be different.

During these 5 years I’ve very rarely been asked how it feels to have diabetes, granted that might be due to social graces but its something I’ve caught myself thinking about lately, how would I describe how it feels, how does it feel to have a hypo or hyper glycaemic attack to some who doesn’t have the disease.

To begin with (if your blood sugar control is sketchy at least) is the ever-present threat of Hypo-glycaemic attacks which¬†is basically very low blood sugar¬†and Hyper-Glycaemic attacks which is¬†very high blood sugar¬†(referred to as “Hypos” and “Hypers” here on out). I used to get a ton of Hypos a few years ago, It is something that you feel come on and if left unattended it saps your strength and leaves you a quivering mess on the floor…. Slight exaggeration but you get the idea. The overriding feeling you get is that you don’t want to do anything but lay spread eagled on your bed and just sleep, anything to conserve what little energy that remains in your limbs. Then you get the raging sweats, it absolutely pours off you, if you ever get to that stage then dive for something sugary at the double.

It feels so awful that when you get something sugary down you its hard to stop because you want to make yourself feel better as fast as possible. This is turn contributes to the boomerang effect where you were once suffering a hypo, all of a sudden you start suffering from a Hyper.

Hypers are another nasty little thing all together, again it messes up your energy levels faster than….. Something fast, everything feels heavy, not that you lose strength but your body feels tighter, not in the normal places like after exercise but in your chest, breathing feels shallower (if that’s a word) the severity can vary but the common symptom for me no matter what is the hazy feeling of sluggishness it brings on and the irritability that comes along for the ride also. Then of course when you start feeling better you feel bad for being irritable to people around you, even though there are mitigating factors.

If you know someone who is diabetic and they say they are having a hypo or hyper, if they are unwell, be understanding as it is a horrible thing to have to deal with, and if they are being particularly short or irritable it is more than possible that they are suffering from high blood sugar.

Oh and lastly how do you get used to injecting yourself all the time?

Its easy when the needles are incredibly small and very fine, if they were any bigger id be bricking it every time I had to get the needle out, so I am very thankful for small mercies!

 

Thanks for reading!

 

Dave

David

 

 

Posted in Anxiety, Diabetes, Health, Personal Thoughts | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Destiny Beta: A Few Thoughts

destiny-21323-1366x768

As we near the end date for the beta of Bungie’s latest “Blockbuster” game “Destiny” I thought it would be appropriate to write down a few sticking points from my own play through of¬†the beta.

First of all it is a very pretty game, it does have a certain borderlands sheen to it as at certain angles it looks a bit cell shaded (Borderlands was fully cell shaded) not to say that is a bad thing, but it is a noticeable similarity. Of course Destiny far outstrips it in terms of beauty, take in the scenery, the wide expansive lakes, the mountainous areas, you could easily take yourself on a sight-seeing tour of the whole map and still enjoy yourself.

So what about the gameplay? Again its Borderlands but mixed with Halo (Naturally since this is the studio that created the Halo series) The ever-present “Ghost” companion that acts as your guide essentially could very well be guilty spark from Halo or Claptrap from Borderlands, except with much less emotion and far more robotic in tone (I will get to that later!). The shooting/combat is a lot of fun actually, this is definitely where it leans on its Halo heritage and why not? The Halo’s were great games, if you look carefully you can see that some of the animation could have been ripped straight from the game such as reloading animations or when your enemies sidestep your bullets it’s all very safe and¬†familiar.

There is your standard PvP game modes that you get with every MMORPG, and these are ok, I couldn’t help getting the feeling that it is quite slow and ponderous at times, matches drag on for sometime and the maps are a little bit bland for my liking, although his is a beta with a severely limited collection of maps so I wont judge it too¬†harshly on that.

Severely limited is something that you could apply to the entire beta as you get capped at lvl 8 and you only get access to 5-6 story missions, after you do that you’ve near enough maxed out your character and the only thing left to do is the multiplayer, maybe its just me but I just can’t sum up the will to play it much when any xp earned is useless and any rewards unlocked could very well be taken away when the final version is released. Now I understand why they’ve limited it somewhat, but it’s so short it just feels like testing out a beta release of a demo of the game whereas back in the day with the first final fantasy MMO you essentially had free reign t do what you wanted within the time span of the beta testing, which I think was around a month (this was on the 360 so it was a while ago and im working from memory).

Ultimately though getting something to try pre-release is pretty good and I appreciate that, but I still can’t help feeling a little disappointed.

The last thing that left an impression was the voice acting, from what I could recognise Bungie have hired a lot of big name actors to voice characters in the game, which is great if they are good at this very different craft. And they are for the most part, however I cant help but thinking that Peter Dinklage who they got to voice the ghost companion isn’t much of a voice actor, getting a great actor like him and make him as emotionless and robotic in tone and manner was an awful, awful choice. It doesn’t feel natural and that is a crying shame.

Those are the things that jumped out at me during my time on destiny, again it is the beta so there is scope for things to improve. Rather than outright criticism think of it as what I would highlight as things to think about as the development process ramps up to release.

Thanks for reading!

Dave

Untitled

 

 

Posted in Entertainment, Gaming, Personal Thoughts, Reviews/Retrospective | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment